I went for a walk on Sunday. It's been ages since I've walked for a few hours, with no destination in mind. The weather was good, though cloudy, and I had a chance to think, to pray, and to admire God's creation. I reached a field and decided to stay there for a bit. There was a ledge covered in moss, so I put my blanket over it, took off my boots and took out my Bible. Across the other side I could see Hanley, tiny rows of houses, buildings and offices, and in the middle of it all, snug in the middle, my church, where I imagined the hustle of a Sunday morning as the sun shone through the windows.
As I sat on the ledge, an inquisitive horse in the other field came over to see what I was doing. Above me, two eagles soared on the winds, and it reminded me of a Bible verse that speaks about God lifting us up like eagles. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on winds like eagles; they will run and not grow weary they will walk and not grow faint." (Isaiah 40:30-31).
Right now, I feel drained of all energy and motivation. I am hurting because of what other people do and don't see, but also because I know I am hurting other people. It hurts, because I realise we are all human and we will never be able to not hurt each other.
How can I fight this selfishness, so that others would be able to see the light that God has given to me? He has not promised us a life free of pain. He has promised us that these sufferings will not be forever. Is it alright to hope that one day I will find a joy that I cannot see right now? My prayer is that God would be strong in my weakness. He's real and He's alive! "If God is for us, who can be against us?" Romans 8:31.